Co-dependency works to maintain the addiction
As codependents, we believe if we tell others what to do, how to do it, when to do it, what to think, it takes the focus off our own lives our responsibility for our own health and well-being.
As families, often we are caught in a cycle of codependency with the addict. We believe if we can control the addict’s decisions, behaviors and beliefs, our lives and the lives of our family members will be more manageable.
From the addict’s perspective, codependency works to maintain the addiction. Often, the addict works at manipulating everyone in order to get his or her needs met. And because the family is often codependent, the manipulation works. In addition, addicts may set their expectations for others too high and use the disappointment as an excuse to continue abusing.
Understanding co-dependent thoughts and behaviors
In planning a family meeting, we discuss signs of codependency in both the family and addict. We begin to create solutions for each family member.
If you’re unclear about codependency, here are a few indicators. It’s helpful to ask yourself if you experience any of these:
- Low self-esteem
- Controlling behavior
- Unclear boundaries
- Perfectionism
- Ongoing shame or guilt
- In a relationship with an addict
- Responsible for other people’s feelings
Setting boundaries sets everyone else free
Recovering from codependency takes baby steps. We will teach you and your loved one how to set clear boundaries and expectations, and embrace self-care with nutrition, exercise, and mindfulness practices, such as meditation.
Internal shifts begin to take place as we walk alongside each of you down this new path. You will have the courage and tools to break through unhealthy learned behaviors and reactions. You will begin to develop a strong sense of self, build healthy personal boundaries and cease tending to everyone else’s needs in place of your own.
When we begin to take care of ourselves, we are more whole so that we can be present to others.
Our highly skilled and professional recovery coaches understand co-dependency. They witness how it works to enable addiction and hijack families. With their guidance and support, families members can begin to set boundaries, care for themselves and allow others to live their own lives. In short, recovery coaching helps set the whole family free to pursue their own hopes and dreams.
